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Jokes


Jokes : 335 

A-Z Index  
  Jokes by category




Joke about blonde


- Why don't blondes call 911 in an emergency?
- She can't find the number 11 on the telephone buttons.


 Categories :   Blonde





Joke about lawyer


A man needing some legal help walks into a law firm.
He asks an attorney:
"If I give you $300 to help answer two legal problems I have, will you help me?"
The attorney replies: "Sure, what's the other question?"


 Categories :   Lawyer





Joke about husband, wife and bust


A couple has been married for many years, and one day the man tells his wife that he wishes she had bigger breasts.
"But how am I going to get bigger breasts?" she asks.
"That's simple." he says, "Just rub your breasts with toilet paper every day."
"And that would do it?" the surprised wife wonders.
"Well," answers the husband, "it sure did work on your behind!"


 Categories :   Husband and wife Bust





Joke about blonde and toilet


Why did the blonde throw breadcrumbs in the toilet?
To feed the toilet duck!


 Categories :   Blonde Toilet





Joke about banana, wordplay short


- What is a banana's favorite gymnastic move?
- The splits!


 Categories :   Banana Wordplay Short





Joke about shopping and turkey


A lady was picking through the frozen turkeys at the grocery store, but couldn't find one big enough for her family.
She asked a stock boy, "Do these turkeys get any bigger?"
The stock boy replied, "No ma'am, they're dead."


 Categories :   Shopping Turkey





Joke about school, little johnny wordplay


Teacher: "Johnny, what is the outside of a tree called?"
Johnny: "I don't know."
Teacher: "Bark, Johnny, bark."
Johnny: "Bow, wow, wow!"


 Categories :   School Little Johnny Wordplay





Joke about russia


Q: What does an Russian and a bottle of beer have in common?
A: They are both empty from the neck up.


 Categories :   Russia





Joke about sumo and feminist


How can you tell a sumo wrestler from a feminist?
A Sumo wrestler shaves his legs.


 Categories :   Sumo Feminist





Joke about husband, wife, masturbation vulgar


A wife catches her husband masturbating under the shower and approaches him.
The husband: Oh dear, it was so dirty that I had to rub it so hard... it almost hurts!


 Categories :   Husband and wife Masturbation Vulgar





Joke about fat


A very fat woman comes into a store and tells the clerk,
"I would like to see a bikini that fits me."
Clerk, "me too..."


 Categories :   Fat





Joke about ads black


A lady puts an ad in the paper that reads: "Recently single and looking for a man that will not run away, not hit me and treat me right in the bedroom."
One day her door bell rings and there is a man with no arms and no legs at the door.
He says: "I am here to answer your ad in the paper. I have no arms so I will not hit you and no legs so I cannot run away."
She says: "What about the good in bed part?"
He says: "How do you think I rang the doorbell?"


 Categories :   Ads Black





Joke about prostitute, bungee jumping vulgar


What do a bungee jump and a Hooker have in common?
They're both cheap, fast, and if the rubber breaks, you're dead.


 Categories :   Prostitute Bungee Jumping Vulgar





Joke about musician, drum short


- Who hangs out with musicians but isn't a musician?
- Drummers.


 Categories :   Musician Drum Short





Joke about blonde and boss


A boss tells a blonde applicant, "I'll give you $8 an hour, starting today, and in three months, I'll raise it to $10 an hour.
So, when would you like to start?"
"In three months."


 Categories :   Blonde Boss







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