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Jokes : 640 

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  Humor by Category

Joke about blonde short

How did the blonde try to kill the bird??
She threw it off a cliff.

 Categories :   Blonde Short

Joke about halloween

Funny picture  about halloween

 Categories :   Halloween

Joke about cat

Funny picture  about cat

 Categories :   Cat

Joke about doctor

A man with pain on his right knee consulted his doctor.
Doctor said: "It is nothing to worry about. It is due to old age."
Patient: "The left knee is of the same age. But how is it that leg does not pain?"

 Categories :   Doctor

Joke about bar

A man goes into a pub and says, "I'd like something tall, icy and full of gin."
The barman turns and shouts into the kitchen, "Oi, Doris!
Someone to see you!"

 Categories :   Bar

Joke about spinach, anal sex vulgar

What do spinach and anal sex have in common?
If you're forced to have it as a kid, you'll hate it as an adult.

 Categories :   Spinach Anal Sex Vulgar

Joke about school and chemistry

Teacher: Donald, what is the chemical formula for water?
Donald: H-I-J-K-L-M-N-O.
Teacher: What are you talking about?
Donald: Yesterday you said it was H to O.

 Categories :   School Chemistry

Joke about curse and wizard

A man goes to see a wizard and says "can you lift a curse that was put on me years ago?"
"Maybe," says the wizard, "if you can remember the exact words of the curse?"
The man replies without hesitation "I pronounce you man and wife..."

 Categories :   Curse Wizard

Joke about condoms short

I use camouflage condoms so they cant see me coming.

 Categories :   Condoms Short

Joke about rabbit, wordplay short

Why did the rabbits go on strike?
They wanted a better celery.

 Categories :   Rabbit Wordplay Short

Joke about lawyer

- How can you tell that an attorney is about to lie?
- His lips begin to move.

 Categories :   Lawyer

Joke about police

A man in his mid forties bought a new BMW and was out on the interstate for a nice evening drive.
The top was down, the breeze was blowing through what was left of his hair and he decided to see what the engine had.
As the needle jumped up to 80 mph, he suddenly saw flashing red and blue lights behind him.
"There's no way they can catch a BMW," he thought to himself and opened her up further.
The needle hit 90, then 100, and finally reality hit him and he knew he shouldn't run from the police, so he slowed down and pulled over.
The cop came up to him, took his license without a word and examined it and the car.
"It's been a long day, this is the end of my shift and it's Friday the 13th.
I don't feel like more paperwork, so if you can give me an excuse for your driving that I haven't heard before, you can go."
The guy thinks for a second and says, "Last week my wife ran off with a cop.
I was afraid you were trying to give her back."
"Have a nice weekend," said the officer and he walked away.

 Categories :   Police

Joke about tattoo

I always look for a woman who has a tattoo.
I see a woman with a tattoo, and I'm thinking, okay, here's a gal who's capable of making a decision she'll regret in the future.

 Categories :   Tattoo

Joke about flower

Funny picture  about flower

 Categories :   Flower

Joke about knife

Funny picture  about knife

 Categories :   Knife

Joke about golf and crocodile

Funny picture  about golf and crocodile

 Categories :   Golf Crocodile

Joke about dog

Funny picture  about dog

 Categories :   Dog

Joke about monkey and knife

Funny picture  about monkey and knife

 Categories :   Monkey Knife

Joke vulgar

There was this old woman who heard a song called "Two Lips and Seven Kisses."
She called up information after hearing the song on the radio to get the name of the record company.
In dialing, she erroneously called up a gas station, and she asks, "Do you have "Two Lips and Seven Kisses?"
The gas station attendant who answered the phone said, "No, but I have two nuts and seven inches!"
So the woman asked, "Is this a record?"
To which the man replied, "No, its average!"

 Categories :   Vulgar

Joke about little girl and dinner

A family was having some people to dinner.
At the table, the mother turned to her six-year-old daughter and said, "Dear, would you like to say the blessing?"
"I wouldn't know what to say," replied the little girl, shyly.
"Just say what you hear Mommy say, sweetie," the woman said.
Her daughter took a deep breath, bowed her head, and solemnly said, "Dear Lord, why did I invite all these people to dinner!?!"

 Categories :   Little girl Dinner


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- Lawyer
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- Wordplay
- Monkey
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